I go around crawling the internet gaming forums……just for GP these days. There’s nothing interesting on forum talk besides nerds yiffing about the future of going digital and whether every new game coming out will be 1080p. Just… just all the usual bullshit that gives me nothing but great aversion to the internet gaming message boards.

Overtime, I wonder if there is any point to the internet beyond hentai and arguing whether or not Lisa Hamilton from Dead or Alive is black or “Latina” simply because Japan has a bad habit of bleaching them to fit their standards of beauty, further pissing all over any universal appeal they could have. But I digress. I often come across topics that pop up from the time to time and people have the same questions within.

“Why is gaming is so boring these days?”

“Why is the industry falling?”

“Why are games not as successful as before?”

And the usual responses fall under-

“Are you crazy? The industry is making so and so billions of dollars more than Hollywood! Look at GTA5!”

“You’re just getting older, so and so priorities and interests change”

“Because of smartphones and mobile markets making consoles not as viable as-“

You know, just the usual bullshit that answers nothing of the industry’s current situation, but is done merely… to save face and silence the dissent of the disappointed and the disillusioned customers. And of course, the reason the answers are always the same is because…. the questions are always the same. Why do we continue to ask questions like “why is the industry failing?” “Why are games looking like movies” “Why do game sales decrease every year”. We, for some reason, cannot think outside the box of common questions, because we all want different explanations to the same questions. You can’t get that on the internet. You have to choose your words carefully. Instead of asking regular people on the internet about why the industry sucks, try emailing your favorite developers and ask something along the lines of…

“What do I pay you for!?”

It’s a really… it’s a simple question. And it seems foolish because the initial and… reactionary response to that is-

“You don’t pay me anything! I don’t work for you!”

Or some random internet gamer would come up with that typical response. Of course, every gamer reacts on emotion rather than reason, and if they thought about it real hard… or got an actual job, they would know that any source of income you receive from your employer usually comes…. from a cash register. And the money in the register comes from paying customers. In that sense, the customer is the real employer, because it is her and/or she that dictates whether you stay employed or not. And customers never ask too much. All they want is some satisfaction.

But then you get to the next question.

“…..hmm… what the fuck DO I pay you for?”

I use this because while we don’t think it, we really have forgotten the real reason we buy a video game. Nowadays we think we have to “support the companies”. They need money to fuel their passion and create technological leaps in graphics and innovation that we should all be “appreciative” of . We have to fuel the kickstarters for Mighty No.9 out of spite against Capcom because Keiji Inafune is awesome or some other mess, even though there is zero appeal in the game itself.

We often forget that we are paying for a product.

So then you get to a whole bunch of other questions.

What kind of product do I pay you to make?

What do I like in a product?

Why do I want to pay you to make this kind of product?

If I were to tell someone like Namco what I wanted out of a Product like Soul Calibur, I would have to say…

I want the same speed as Soul Calibur 2

I want characters that retain their original moves for the sake of familiarity. I’m tried of being jealous of shoto scrubs and having to relearn my favorites for every installment in the series.

I want Talim to grow a few cup sizes.

I want an AI that doesn’t make me feel inadequate for simply touching the controller.

I want you to steal ideas from Castlevania when it comes to music. Not when it comes to raphael.

I want a story that goes back to being about several warriors searching for the ultimate sword and seeing the numerous outcomes of the rat race. Not some asshole who goes around killing random homeless people because he misses his mommy.

That’s just a general basis, but to be serious. What do I want out of a Sonic game?

Multiple playable characters with similar but different play styles. I haven’t played a unique Knuckles since 06, and I’m getting quite pissed about that. And where is Rouge?

Techno Dreamworld aesthetics and atmosphere in the same vain as Sonic CD and Knuckles Chaotix

No silly universal gameplay gimmicks like teamplay or Wisps.

No ripping off fucking Mario.

No Special Stages. No really, fuck Special Stages.

Doesn’t have to be long, 7 Zones are fine.

No obligatory fetch quests.

No obligatory puzzles during the levels

No obligatory missions like “find grocery bags for this random white bitch just so she can randomly give you a key into the next zone.”

2D/3D, I don’t care, just make it work.

I think at the price of at least $40-60, these are reasonable demands. I use demands because as I am the one paying, I expect satisfaction.

Yes, that’s what I want out of my Sonic product.

So when you go through what has been truly 7 whole years without these demands met, you have the common, very common topics crop up like “why aren’t Sonic games fun anymore?”. Because the games being produced were not made to be satisfactory.

You find this case often times with many games and franchises over the years where fans continue to ask the same question where “these games just aren’t fun anymore”. Mainly because a fundamental change has taken place within the series. Some flucuation of content or fun factor that completely shifts the tides of enjoyment away from the customers and accumulated into an ever expanding niche market.

“Why did you change this product? I did not want to pay for this!”

You enjoyed this game one way, but now it has been significantly altered to the point that any satisfaction you could’ve had… is stripped from it! And you’re left wondering just why.

What was wrong with the way it was before? I liked it better this way

And when you ask that question, the answers you may often find (because you can’t get them from message boards with those corporate kiss ass hardcore gamers/shills) will be world shattering. Take for instance, Sonic Heroes. The questions you may often ask to the creators of that game would be..

Why can’t I use the characters like I could in previous games?

Why do I have to play 3 characters at a time?

Why does it feel like I have just 4 clones of the same characters who, for the most part, take the same exact paths through each and every level when in previous Sonic games, I could take different paths depending on the characters and choices I make.

Why is the story so barely there?

Why is Rouge so conservative in her appearance now?

Why couldn’t you just rebuild Gamma instead of creating this new, fugly robot? You brought back Big even though everyone hates him.

Why is Cream even in the game?

Why is Team Chaotix so tedious to play with when they’re supposed to be the coolest characters to play as?

Why not just make an SA3 when you had the perfect chance?

The answer you find when you search for them… is that Takashi Iizuka… simply didn’t want to make a Sonic Adventure 3. He wanted… to try something different. That difference was a complete subversion and reversal from the staples of Sonic Adventure 2, probably one of the most memorable Sonic titles ever created despite it’s sheer simplicity, still holds a special place in many a Sonic fan’s heart. But it’s because…. he wanted to try something different.

Strange as it may be, you will often find the same answer from every other developer in this industry.

Why did you make Super Mario more about puzzle solving in inter-connected “rooms” disguised as giant boulders in space?

Why did you turn Zelda into a teen drama with an asthmatic Link that can barely run a few centimeters without passing out all over the floor?

Why did you make Resident Evil less about Zombies and survival and more about tactical shooting and cinematics?

Why do you bleach every black girl’s skin in every fighting game out there?

Why did you turn Castlevania and Devil May Cry into parodies of Uwe Bole’s film making skills?

Why did you turn Kirby into fucking Yarn?

Why did you remove Talim, Zasalamel, Seong Mina, and countless other characters from the fifth game?

Why are you doing so many things that I clearly do not pay you to do?

Many of these will have the same exact reasons given. Because the developers will often “try something different” because they make the same mistakes that forum dwellers often make. “Why would anyone want the same things over and over again? It’s just bound to get boring!“.

Why don’t you let me decide that when I actually get bored of it? Not when you THINK I am?

In a small part, we have allowed this to happen. Because we didn’t protest game companies enough as we were all fooled into thinking that all these technological jumps in 3D graphics and computer centric entertainment were just a natural evolution of games. So we didn’t mind when companies basically said “fuck it” during the 6th generation. But during the seventh, an awakening consciousness occurred. We startedactually liking games again. Not since the death of Genesis and SNES did it feel like we were playing actual games again. Not some piss ass attempts at turning games “into art” like all these college dipshits often feel equates to God’s love.

But then, you ask the question to the 3rd Parties…

Why don’t you make fun games like this again?

And their current responses are “fuck you”.

We’ve seen… a massive mutiny of publishers and developers who have decided that you are suddenly an enemy. For when we allowed them to get away with their brainless “artsy/FPS” dick waving contests, they were shocked and disgusted that you actually demand variety with the same level of quality! No. Now you are “selfish” and “self-entitled”. “Spoiled” “Sheepish”. Put only YOUR interests before their desires. So your reward is their middle finger.

Why are you being hostile to my demands?

Because, like any human who forgets his own mortality, feels they are above the Gods they serve. Overtime, they question your own power and worth to them. And often times, they feel it is unnecessary to appease you. Because you are just “selfish”.

So after a long journey of questions and more questions, we come back to the original question.

What’s wrong with the gaming industry.

The problem with the gaming industry is the gaming industry. The solution for customers are customers.

The reason is you’ve given them too much power and money. Now it is time to revoke the privilege. If you are not satisfied, don’t mope around and accept that you are “just getting older” or whatnot. The real reason anyone loses interest in anything is because of a decrease in quality or an interest in something of higher quality steals youaway. That is always the case of human nature. People don’t just “grow out of things”. Certain behaviors are never grown out of depending on the consequences of those behaviors. Do people naturally grow out of an addiction? Do you just stop smoking after your 20s? Do you stop drinking after your 30s? Do you grow out of Football after your childlife?

But…… because we grow out of edutainment like Barney or Sesame Street, we assume this is the case with everything we have an interest in. We assume we just naturally grow out of video games, and entertainment medium that caters to ALL AGES, whether you are a child or an adult. Video games have always strives to appease audiences of all ages. You will never find the large majority of games to cater only to children or teenagers. You can always find something that appeals to you.

So when a large number of gamers say “why is gaming boring”, there is nothing wrong with the gamer. We never ask the question…

Why is it that everytime I question why the industry sucks, people say it’s because of me?

Because gamers, like every other idiot in the world, has bought into the lies of ORIGINAL SIN!

You hate a game cause you suck. You hate a movie because you don’t understand it’s “complicated themes”. You don’t have an appreciation for the realities of “The Last of Us”!

We have these insults in the gaming world, where these dogs send their shills to the internet to silence all forms of dissent because they don’t want to make their games satisfactory to you! They don’t give a damn about you, just your money, but you ain’t shit! And yet have the gall to insult you in their own interviews, calling you sheepish for demanding actual quality that they have the balls to assume you owe them anything more than your support!

The game industry has simply forgotten it’s place… as YOUR servants. For a servant performs a “service”. And a service is supposed to provide “satisfaction”. And if the service you paid for doesn’t provide the satisfaction, you have a right to revoke their so-called dues. Your satisfaction is priority #1, and you will remind them of that fact.

That said, my question is…

Why does Call of Duty still satisfy people?

And that is rhetorical.