If anyone is wondering… pfff, no one cares. Well to put it bluntly, i’ve been binjing (I spelled that so wrong) on Bioware games. Some guy at work read my post on Mass Effect kicking Pokemon’s ass. And responded to my last paragraph. 

Yeah I know there’s been ass loads of articles on Mass Effect and how it’s really about false choice. But what game does choice better?

He replies Dragon Age. Now, I’ve been wary of this mother fucker’s suggestions ever since he dared to mention the “Witch and the Hundred Night“… but shit, he was right! Dragon Age is better in so many ways than Mass Effect. And I loathe medieval fantasy! Too many of them are taking after LOTR anyways, they look shittier than COD clones. I’m like… damn you Bioware, why can’t I hate you!?

So I get Origins, DA2, and Inquisition. Origins was ok but the combat was slow and boring, and the worlds were too fucking brown (typical western developed game) but it made up for it with a compelling narrative… so long as you pick a mage and nothing else… ok I didn’t like Origins much. But that bitch Morrigan… when I got that “Dark Promise” achievement, I was unnerved. Idk why but I kept thinking I made a mistake. But i’ll never know why and we’ll get to that. Origins was just… average. 

DA2 was supposedly the game everyone hated, and I’m confused as to why. It‘s fucking awesome! The combat doesn’t suck anymore, the companions are likable… but you can’t choose your origin anymore? Bah, oh well. Honestly, I dont know why they didn’t adopt the dialogue system of DA2 for Mass Effect altogether. Your options aren’t buttfucked depending on whether or not you have enough Paragon points to keep Miranda and Jack happy. And even the creepy ass romance system isn’t dependant on some tacky loyalty missions. Not only that but the companions actually feel like they’re involved in the overall story and aren’t just a part of some checklist to keep pace on a suicide mission. 

Dem ninja skillz.

Yeah. Dragon Age 2 is everything Mass Effect 2 should’ve been.

I was mad hyped for Inquisition. So I popped this bitch in, dealt with the big ass install size only to have EA balls in my mouth. How so? Well for those who weren’t aware, Mass Effect had this system whereby you could import save files from previously finished games, so the choices you made in the first game would carry into the next and alter a few bits or more. Bioware kept that trend for Dragon Age, but to a lesser degree. Very little of what you did in Origins has any tangible effect in DA2. Similar to ME1-ME2. Though I assumed Origins would matter more in Inquisition so as I salivated at Morrigan’s return to see if this demon baby would be a hidden boss, I come to find this out.

In order to even have that occur, I would instead have to make an Origins account, sign on and use a program called “Dragon Age Keep” and… “check off” decisions from Origins and DA2. Then I would have to boot my game up, log into the Origins account, and then import that checklist into the game in order to actually continue any progress you made from the previous titles.

That’s bullshit! Now why the fuck would they go and chain you to some fucking account system just so you can say your goddamn world state is consistent with the previous goddamn games in the series!? Oh of course, cunt ass EA derives some sadistic pleasure in enslaving people, whether it be smaller studios, indies, or the consumer in some BS account system because they see fit to control everything in existence! Imagine if they charged money for that keep shit! And no, I’m gonna give them ideas, I want people to rise against these demonic asswipes… jeez I sound like Anders!

I’m astounded at just how evil this company truly is. Those foolish enough to believe EA’s claims of leaving Bioware alone got manure on their dicks. #1 most hated company in America indeed!

It bad enough the combat is ass again, but I can’t get far w/o the game fucking up on me every so often. Oh but lets make it some open world bullshit where you travel long distances on horse! Dats fun, rite!? Fuck out of here with that shit, man. 

I’m so sick of this industry trying to string you to the fucking internet. It’s getting to the point that it’s a prerequisite before anything else. Hell that was almost the case with Xbone.