That Rocky horror picture show painted a picture of something exceptionally fucked! I regret watching it now. 

Alright guys who still gives a wet fart.  After 2 years I’ve managed to finally get back to this tired blog. After some assistance, I’ve resorted to using an app since WordPress is not working on a browser.
Being in place with no internet or cable, you learn to appreciate the little things in life and naturally be grateful for what you have. Cheesly enough, I’ve patched up shit with my sister (after she locked me out for 3 weeks as payback) and she helped me get this wordpress app which… ain’t perfect but shit I’ll take w/e I can get! 

That said… im back britches!! And… *sigh* I thank you all for sticking with me even after my long ass hiatus (shouts out to Asia_catalog for reading more than just my Sonic posts) as well as to all who have kept me updated with all the latest news regarding the failures of this industry. I really appreciate that, thank you.

That being said, I had to rely on something nefarious for any gaming news for the last year.

Ok yeah,  Because I’m cheap and had no access to Amazon, I have this nonsense membership that forces this magazine on yah, cause toilet paper is gettin expensive. But before I could introduce Mr. Propaganda to madame excrement, something caught my eye.

I thought “by the balls of Ra! You doorknobs have nothing better to cover than Sonic’s fall from grace yet again! ?” 

Guess so. Considering how most gaming magazines are misinformative tripe, I could only imagine the horrors they would spew. After all, these bastards criticized their own readers for covering VR for an entire issue.

Cantankerous, Christs balls. Lets ignore their real complaints and attack the easy bits to feel credible! Who needed internet when you can see the same neogaf styled flame wars right here! 

Despite their lacking professionalism, the article in question tells us nothing we dont already know and regurgitates the same info you and the rest of the nets have covered in the last few years. Here is the article in question. 

Granted, this piece isn’t as harrowing as I feared, but still manages to provide nothing but the most rudimentary knowledge of the Hedgehog’s downfall. There was an entire block dedicated to Sonic 06, but y’all dont wanna see that again,  right?

What did catch my attention was the block regarding the development of Sonic Heroes. Iizuka noted that it was the most stressful game he had ever made. The majority of the article talks a good deal about mismanaged development cycles, but this game in particular strikes me as odd. Sonic Heroes didn’t get the bile hatred that every game afterwards got. 

Look, as much shit I give this game, I have to admit… its honestly not all bad. No, fuck that. Its a great game! In spite of all the bullshit that went down, It turned out fine. The team play system is not a got a favorite of mine, but at its core, it rarely muddles the pacing of the game. And for what its worth, the game does a nice job of combining combat mechanics with Sonic’s speed with the exception of certain levels and the entirety of Team Chaotix. It felt like how an old school Sonic game would feel in 3D, going so far as to bring back special stages, a 2 act format with a boss fight in the last. Shit, you’ve got people asking for a Sonic Heroes 2.

I’m convinced that Sonic Team is capable of working under pressure. However,  this article in question points most of the problems on Sega’s crazy deadlines. Now… it is true that the deadline is responsible for crushing Sonic 06… but the rest of the muck!? 

Shadow the Hedgehog = guns. 

Unleashed = Werehog. 

Colors = Wisps. 

Lost Mind = Puzzles. 

Boom = art style. 

The deadlines weren’t the issues of these titles.  The ideas were.

Yes, I know they brought that up, but there should’ve been more on that factor. Cause then we’d have to ask what the deadlines were for Sonic Advance 1-3, Rush and Rush Adventure, five titles that GI failed to mention, all of which came out during the same period that Sonic 06 was created, all of which received praise. Is it  not possible to… not accentuate the negative and still criticize the series for having a lack of quality control? Primarily in the creative department? How do you explain the reception of those titles if Sega’s deadlines are just the worst?

Who implemented these ideas and why? This is the heart of which Sonic died. That deserved to be explored. But… nothing.  We simply get Iizuka’s tale of woe (not to be insensitive ). But what could be expected of an industry driven magazine than a mediocre investigation?