Yep…. I’m a hypocrite.

For years, I’ve always been puzzled by the notion that Sonic fans were considered to be the #1 worst fanbase in all of entertainment…dom… based on the assumption of their sexual preferences. If you find Rouge’s bosom to be the bomb, then something was clearly wrong with you.

Knowing how people on the internet crucify anything because they know they an get away with it, it’s easy enough to take those notions with a grain of salt as it’s mostly a bunch of teenagers running off at the mouth. Fuck do they know?

Still, having dealt with these fans for well over 20 years, the consideration itself is close. You won’t find any fanbase that is this irritating, I assure you. These are the kinds of people that provoke you into the mindset that “they shouldn’t be listened to” not because most of them are infact wrong, but because you really want to spite them. Fandom of any sort can work a nerve, but it’s simply fascinating how Sonic fans go about it. Most of all is when you wish to explain any thing that this fandom might disagree with, and they, beyond all logic and reason, come to wretchedly fallacious conclusions.


For instance, when I complain about Tails having more emphasis on his “boy genius” status, I get a response that goes on to say “Tails has always been a tech genius. He can fly a plane” or something of that nature. Disregarding the fact that piloting skills and engineering capabilities are, while not mutually exclusive, 2 completely different things, it’s the bone headed logic in which displaying any sort of proficiency with technology via pure operation is somehow a measure of one’s intellect. So if we were to point to Sonic piloting the Tornado at the end of Knuckles’s story in S3K, or one of Robotnik’s Egg Mobiles in Launch Base of S3K as well, we could theoretically say that Sonic was also a tech genius as well.

Well shit, all I need to do is drive something and people will think I’m smart!

And no, it wasn’t a comment on this blog

This is really the kind of shit you deal with when it comes to Sonic fans, and I often compare them to Pokemon fans as they make the same childish arguments and rebuttals in which you can’t be bothered with. When it comes right down to it, you’re battling against impulse and egos. Logic is a weak weapon against the ego. Trying to understand the pathology of the Sonic fandom is like quantum physics. Or at least I thought it was.

I’ve talked to the more um… “sane” sectors of the fandom, and I’ve been one to go on and on about how trying to reason with the fandom at large is going to do nothing but invite frustration, anger, and rage. The common reaction would be “life’s too short”, I’d say “Damn skippy”. So why would we waste time trying to reason with them? Same reason any civil war breaks out in any fanbase. It’s like we’re all vying for the attention of the game developers, jumping up and down screaming “we want this kind of game to be made!” while the other side would say “No, fuck them, make this kind of game for us!” and the cycle never stops.

And especially since we have developers/publishers at Sega who keep going on making remarks about their fans riling people up online in some sort of mentality that we need to “appear a certain way” to appease them. It makes me want to compare Sonic fans to African folks in some way.

But I’m going off into a tanget that would piss more people off than usual. One person commented that Sonic fans are unreasonable because they only look at things at surface value. They don’t see beyond the face of what is presented to them. And he’s absolutely right. There’s nothing else to explain the rather bizarre and… stupid reactions the fans have toward this series beyond their impulsive and reactionary tendencies other than their own refusal to think about a damn thing.

Again, with Sonic Boom. You try to explain what’s wrong with the game as of now, I don’t give a fuck if you are an artist or a programmer, if you find shit wrong with the game, you are simply being “negative”. Negative being “harmful, bad, or just Not Wanted”. Your critical analysis is harmful to fans simply because it does not match with their optimism. What is being said is “do not give me a reason to lower my expectations”. Instead of looking deeper and trying to figure out why people are upset, it’s immediately written off as a sense of negativity. Yes, lack of empathy goes into it.

This the main issue at hand. When Sonic fans fail to look beyond the surface, they fail to understand anything. This is the core of their rampant idiocy, combined with impulsive behaviors and the almighty ego. When you are driven by your ego, you care not what anyone else thinks. It is in conflict with your ideals automatically, therefore it is wrong and must be quashed.

Speaking of ideals, there seems to be some recent trend in the fandom in which story is given more attention than it needs. Particularly in the department of tone. And I don’t know why I feel Deviantart needs special attention, though it is the primary location where it’s fair game to deride the Archie Comic series for possessing testicular fortitude. The comics have been under fire for having much darker storylines such as having a robot Sally strangle Sonic while Robotnik leaves him be. Sonic and Tails having their own personal conflicts (no one complains about Tails’s period in Lost Mind) and etc. They’ve got ridiculous stamps going around proclaiming their twat status of hating a comic book adaptation for simply being “darker” than the more “recent” Sonic games that have only been going on for about 5 years compared to a comic series that’s been going around for 20.

The “Tone Wars” are a recent trend where, since the creation of Iizuka’s personal Shadow the Hedgehog, the fandom is thrown into mentacide of trying to dictate whether the series should ever be dark again, or just be as gay as Teletubbies. By this notion, the fans automatically hate anything that might imply a darker take on the series regardless of whether it’s well done or has been going on for years. It’s the fact that “darker shit” is going down, and it is not to be tolerated. The surface is the “dark”. Being of higher quality wouldn’t matter.

So the impulse reaction would be hostility toward the darkness, so to speak. That means anything in the Sonic series would come under fire that displayed any sort of “rawness” the series was in some ways known for. This creates a big problem because… Sonic was marketed as more of an “edgy” series, and with the Adventure titles led to the expectations of Sonic to be cool. But if you have a fanbase that wants PBS levels of lameness to be the standard for the series to follow on ALL fronts, then it would be doomed. No one, not even the supporters, remotely enjoys the BS we’re being served.

Yet the fandom can’t or refuses to see this. The games might be shit, but the tone is perfectly fine, disregarding that it is the main thing that is alienating general audiences because no one finds this shit cool. One would be tempted to suggest that Sonic fans are a bunch of pussies. A pussy would be offended by Sonic getting strangled by a robot with Robotnik leaving him to his own demise. A pussy would not advocate a “darker take” on the Sonic series (even when darker would imply SA2 levels of “dark”). A pussy would want saccharin entertainment so as to not be disturbed in any way by the characters acting out in violence. Because violence that isn’t sugar-coated is wrong for a cartoon hedgehog. A pussy wants to maintain that a cartoon cannot have violence. That said, the Sonic fans on Deviantart are a bunch of pussies who believe a comic book series is bad because it maintains a semblance of rawness to it’s content.

Then you get to the arguments about why the series tone should be one way over another, based on the fact that it is a “cartoon hedgehog”.  This is a recent blanket statement that I’m sure everyone’s heard. This is one argument that chaps my ass like you wouldn’t believe because they are implying that Sonic games… shouldn’t be appealing at all because the original concept is “silly” to them. That a hedgehog who can run really fast taking on an overweight doctor is “stupid in general” so trying to make a “serious” game based on this concept is a mistake overall. Now, I’m not entirely against the idea that Sonic games need to cut back on story details when regarding accessibility…. but to use this as an excuse to make Sonic lame is underhanded. Every “super hero” in history has “silly” concepts that we can generalize and belittle (A rich guy builds a robot suit to defend the universe! A guy dresses up like a rodent because he misses his mommy. Giant Alien Robots fighting over a giant box. A Spider bite turns you into a guy who shoots semen out of his hands). And there’s reason for it. It’s a work of fiction. Fiction is always going to have “silly” concepts because it’s not real. Does that mean they have to be incredibly lame? Of course not. Not being realistic isn’t an excuse to disregard the concept in it’s totality. If a movie about 6 supers featuring a god and a green monster with anger management issues can break box office records, then why is it that a Hedgehog is given less of an opportunity to shine?

The “cartoon hedgehog” is the other surface. Now, my take on this little tidbit is that because cartoons are widely perceived to be for children, that having any elements that seem too dark in them is automatically bad because children are watching. But there’s always an origin to everything and I’ve always wondered why “cartoons were for children”. This is only a theory of mine, but hear me out.

Back in the times when movie cinemas were the only source of visual entertainment, they always had these cartoon shorts before the movies came on, some way to pass the time. Tom and Jerry, Loony Tunes, what may have you. And some folks might’ve enjoyed them, but overall, people wanted to watch the actual movie and the cartoons were just a waste of their time. Then we get to the advent of television and these companies started putting their “pass the time” cartoons on tv. But adults didn’t have the time or desire to watch cartoons. But children had all the free time in the world and they became cartoon’s biggest audience, so over time, out of fear of the dreaded soccer moms, the cartoons that had all kinds of violence and shit started to become toned down for children because they were afraid of violent cartoons influencing violent behaviors, same way people complained about RoboCop and Mortal Kombat.

Idk if that’s how it went down, feel free to correct me and call me a dipshit in the same process, but it makes sense to me in some regard, it would explain some of the more extreme behaviors in regards to the Sonic comics. But see… that’s actually thinking about why perceptions are the way they are. Sonic fans throw out blanket statements about why Sonic games shouldn’t have “serious” content because it’s a cartoon without any fucking base, it’s annoying. And this is the core of their problems. You try to use logic against people who don’t, and you’re gonna have a headache. Because they don’t look beyond the surface of the Sonic Franchise Concepts. They’ve built so many surfaces, they’ve created their own box! And since they won’t think things through, they cannot go outside of their box. They suggest Sonic can be nothing more than silly because it’s a “cartoon Hedgehog” but gives no inferences about why a cartoon in general must be silly or “light-hearted” in nature. Since there never is an explanation given, then people can’t help but be frustrated and assumptive about what they mean.

Because of Sonic Fandom’s strong tendency to not think about their claims, people have a tendency to associate them with some mental disorder (autism being over-stated) which then leads to articles like the Guardian’s tirade against the fandom. “Well, if Sonic fans don’t think, then how do they know what they want?“. It’s a doozy of a question even though I’d point to whatever is selling the most.

Answering the question of “what Sonic fans want” is never simple because most Sonic Fans are in a state of mental atrophy it seems. If you cannot look beyond the surface of certain things in Sonic the Hedgehog, then you really have no business claiming to be a Sonic fan. It’s this kind of nonsense that allowed the pervasive “NO CHARACTERS ALLOWED” BS to run rampant after 06 for 7 fucking years, because the fans couldn’t see beyond character inclusion as some sort of “problem” rather than the gameplay elements they were crammed into. That’s why I feel that developers have to have some psychic powers to figure out what’s wrong half the time, because the fans (most of them anyway) can’t be arsed to articulate just what in the fresh hell they’re so pissed off about. It’s also why I’ve… made those asshole comments about fans being at fault for the state of the series.