No, not him

Yeah, her.

I checked out “Remember Me” (Amma, what a stupid title for a game) out of recommendation and had no idea this was also made by Capcom. Thankfully it was used in some vain attempt to piss off the industry.

As you could already assume, I can’t stand the AAA interactive movie type games that are only good for one playthrough and then you stuff it away in some box somewhere. Was actually kinda appealing to my interests. I’m one of those big “sci fi” buffs, plus having an African female lead that’s “positive” is awesome. I guess the industry felt it was time to let go of stereotypes by suggesting that African leads can only have positive traits by being mulatto.

Then again, Tommy was handled pretty well, too. Despite lack of screen time

Anywho, the game confirms my suspicions that Science Fiction only works well in video games as other entertainment mediums rely on good characters to have a solid narrative. Video games aren’t dependent on narratives which makes science fiction that much more viable in gaming. For those who have played the game, you can pretty much skip ahead. For all the normal people who missed out…

This game takes place in Paris, France (OOH LALAH!) where this new corporation “Memorize” has crafted technology in which people can share memories with each other. The game starts out with one of the most awkward fake advertisements in which “real customers” talk about their experiences like the retards on those E-Harmony/Christian Mingle commercials. Then quickly opens up to Nilin (the mulatto) getting her memory wiped by a Memorize employee. All characters have these holographic nodes on the back of their necks similar to the plugs that the Matrix series had, where memories can be shared or stolen… or even “changed”. More on that later. Anywho, Nilin, looking like a crack addict out of the ghetto, is forced to walk to a device that would make her mentally inert. But then she’s contacted by a guy named “edge” who hacks the security systems and allows her to escape from the facility into the garbage via a coffin.

Handsome devil, ain’t he?

 

She’s flung into a sewage into the broken down parts of Paris where she’s met by a bunch of anorexic mutants called “leapers” for no apparent reason, where she’s forced to kick their asses and move on.

Looks like a scene from the Amazing Spiderman. It’s too damn dark, for one.

Here, you’ll find that you’ll be doing lots and lots of climbing. And climbing… and climbing. Basically, if you’re a fan of what one person would call “Ass Creed”, you’ll feel right at home.

So you have to traverse the slums while fighting a few more leapers. For a run down poor district, it looks nice. Like a portion of Manhattan was just placed in the slums to make the poor folks not feel like shit. Along the way, you’ll learn about RM’s convoluted combat system.

Nice job making this game accessible, assholes.

I might as well be doing complex fractions having to figure this shit out. Anywho, you learn that Red equals damage, yellow is healing, purple is cooldown, and blue is bullshit you’ll never use. See, the game emphasizes the importance of rhythm and timing with combos. IE as soon as you hit an enemy, you immediately press the next button in the sequence. Opening up the menu, you have a combo lab in which you get to mix and match your own combo set ups. Like say if you want damage on one hit, while yourself on the next, you configure them to be as you wish. You have to unlock all the moves in the game as you level up so getting the combo set ups you want is going to require loads and loads of grinding.

“Aw jeez!, not that shit again!”

Unfortunately, the jackoffs behind the game know nothing of good game design or else the game wouldn’t require you to dodge so much, breaking your combo chains on multiple occasions. It seems you’re always in a situation where you’re ganged up by enemies and that merely hitting an enemy even once causes another enemy to immediately attack you, meaning you have to dodge anyway, breaking your chains in the process. This happens frequently throughout the game meaning you’d have to make very linear, one-dimensional combos in order to get the full benefits of them. Make one combo set healing, another for damage, etc. etc.

This leads me to believe that the combo system was some attempt at “creativity” and “innovation” which falls flat on it’s face. The combat simply isn’t fun and soon becomes a slow routine chore. Fortunately, the battles are infrequent so there’s less of that to worry about.

After fucking around with Leapers, you meet headache Tommy who remembers you… but you don’t remember him. Basically, he claims that you and he were part of a resistance movement (Not this shit again) trying to take down Memorize because… reasons pertaining to naturalism. There, Nilin gets out of her hobo cloths and dresses into… casual clothing with a “cool glove”.

And tight jeans! ^_^

Funny enough, before we can get ready, Nilin immediately gets caught by a bounty hunter named “Olga” (man, you’d think with a “creative” game, these folks would work more on better naming conventions). But it’s here that Nilin hacks into Olga’s memory.

Now this is actually one of the cooler (if not fucking tedious) aspects of the game. Changing someone’s memory. Here, you see Olga’s memory of her husband who’s life she tried to save by transferring her… “happy memories” to David. I don’t know how the fuck that would save his life, but w/e. Science Fiction always breaks the laws of reality, no matter how implausible. I mean Pacific Rim, man.

Anywho, here you have to make Olga think that Memorize killed David. Unfortunately, the game messed up on me and I had to restart it a million butt fucking times just to get it to work. That’s another thing about this game. It is buggy as all hell. Ya’ll mother fuckers talk dirt about Sonic 06, play this mug here, ya’ll change yo tunes real fast. I can’t recall anytime 06 froze on me… at all.

Anywho, this rather “cool segment” is more like a puzzle, unfortunately. You have to find several “glitches” in which you can change or alter in order to remix the memory. Corse, you might wanna be careful. Sometimes you’ll actually kill the person who’s memory you’re trying to change. Ended up giving Olga a seizure or an orgasm.

Really!?

No, but if I say that, more people will buy the game. Once you remix the memory, Olga’s behavior changes and she decides to help you instead.

Unfortunately, that’s the only time the feature is actually cool. Once you know what you have to do, it gets tedious. But it is cool to see all the different outcomes of what you do.

*drool*

Once you get passed that, you get one of those shitty “lamenting” scenes where Nilin is in some weird… distorted space where she “laments” on what she just did. After that, you go to Chapter’s beautiful ass rich folk town.

It’s here that Nilin knows how it feels to be well off as well as the feeling of doing as Mariah Carry says and become a…er… butterfly.

Oh yeah, this shit actually happens.

These are the “skills” you can use. There’s no explanation for why she can use them, but w/e, more kick ass powers. This is why you have “cool down” combos because the cool down rates for these skills last for about 100 seconds (goddamn!). So using these cooldown combos help to speed up the process.

Then I realized the combo system is retarded for things like this. You’ll end up using your skills very often as enemies start requiring them more than usual. The only combos you’ll be using are heals and cooldowns, while enemies become assets to use more skills and heal on. The point of the combo system isn’t to have cool, customized combos, they’re more of an asset of using the most basic combo strings hopefully configured with the desired effects just to use skills more often. Instead of using something more logical like MP or some shit, you have to hit people in rhythmic fashion.

Well, at least you don’t have to “charge” your moves.

After a while of running and climbing and hitting people, you go into a luxurious mall and meet your biggest fan who literally jerks off to the thought of you taking his memory. Once you do so, you get another little gaming element called “Remembranes” which is basically you following hollowgrams and eventually means the game sets up wheels for you to spin.

Then you find plans to flood the district because Edge hates rich folks (or something) and then you fight some fat guy called Kid Christmas who talks like Xhibit. Seriously, Kid fucking Christmas is the best name you could come up with!? Anywho, after beathing his ass, you now have a gun.

Cool, an arena made with cheap square effects.

Afterward, the city is flooded. Take that, rich bitches!

After more running around, shit happens and you find yourself in the ruins of Neo Paris. Everything is tipped in green foliage and I think I might’ve skipped some details. You fight a giant robot that uses holographic images to scream at you. But here’s the thing, you can attack with combos, you can only use your blaster and a disabling skill you learn earlier. Prepare fo’ dat cooldown rate!

Next few chapters has Nilin running away from Choppers, solving crappy riddles, and discovering a plot that becomes irrelevant for the rest of the game. The Leapers? Yeah, they’re mutated inmates in a prison where their memories were wiped completely, but Memorize decided to use them as test subjects for some reason. But this is never really elaborated on later, you just fight more leapers. Along the way, Nilin discovers that her parents are actually the founders of Memorize and this causes her great discomfort. Helluva twist, though.  Cause it gets you thinking who the hell Edge really is and why he’s got you doing dirty work. Then, you find out your glove was made by Nilin’s daddy who wiped her memory of a tragic car accident and found the secret to removing misery in the world… by removing painful memories.

We find out Edge is actually some big ass storage box where all the painful memories are kept and basically wanted you to crash the system because he doesn’t like getting so many bad memories… or something.

Oh shit, I just spoiled the game. Oh well. It’s an ok game with nice ideas, but considering the flawed gameplay, flow, the idiotic padding, and the severe bugs that halt your progress, not to mention tedious combat, I think I saved ya’ll a good $17. Still, the environments are probably the best I’ve seen in any game thus far (second to Crack in Time, I suppose) but that’s mostly cause I like Sci Fi shit.

It’s an ok rental, I suppose.

Advertisements