It’s hard to believe that I go to work with hardcore gamers. When I was trying to discuss Monolith’s sick looking “X”, I mentioned something about giant robots. That automatically reminded him of a game called Titanstar…. or Starfall, w/e the fuck it’s name is. I tell him “fuck is that shit?”. He seems shocked! Almost taken back by my ignorance of a single title! He demands I research this mythical beast of a video game so that I may gain his approval in knowledge.

This is the fruit of my quest for knowledge.

It’s Modern Warfare….with mechs.

This is what I’m supposed to climax from? This is the game he’s most excited for? Gutter trash! More hyped up military shooters is NOT what this industry needs anymore. “Oh look! A new way to kill army pawns! JOY!

Too many people think all video games are a bunch of military shooters, and hearing that shit tires the fuck out of me. And then people wonder why everyone runs to Nintendo, hoping for those lying, arrogant assholes to become the “saviors of gamedom”. After the euthanasia of NSMB, the failure of Mario Kart 7, the apparent destruction of Super Smash Bros., and the delusional and utterly deceitful 3D World, there is no hope for Nintendo to fulfill that made up “destiny”. The fucked up thing is Titanfarce is going to end up being GOTY and the second COD craze. I can see it now. All FPS’s will have mech combat. Infact, all future games will feature some sort of mech combat because it was hyped up in Titanfarce, it becomes a hit success in USA, and giant robots are ALL THE RAGE in gaming. Content Saturation begins anew.

There are no cool or interesting features presented in Titanfarce beyond just having mechs. What do you do with the mechs? Same shit you do on foot. FPS standard combat with some sort of gravity gun which seems to have been taken directly from “District 9“. Infact, the game SCREAMS District 9. You know, without all the cool aliens.

As well, the music is as uber serious as can be. There’s a lot that can be said of western developers that design games with serious OSTs. It reeks of insecurity that video games are still not taken seriously despite the hefty amount of work put into them. It’s hard to take a game like Titanfarce seriously because… they’re giant robot mechs. Who in this day in age would take that seriously? Especially on a video game?

I also love the limited enthusiasm of the audience. During the playthrough sequences, no one says a damn thing until the video is over. Probably glad that they don’t have to hurt their eyes with the utter silliness of the game itself.

Not to mention (in typical western design), the mechs look like shit. You know what game has giant mechs but wins more respect from people despite it’s similar content? “X

And the mechs look thrice as sexy. Unlike those poor man’s APU bots from the Matrix Reloaded.

Not to mention the game requires online components just to function at all, meaning the game is pure Computer Style. I lost interest just hearing that. Not that many people can get access to the internet. What with mass unemployment going around and people having shitty jobs that don’t pay jack, there’s no point in even owning this game. Exclusionary Gaming is real. The masses who cannot get internet are excluded from this game entirely. In order to have true mass appeal, the game must have elements that cater to different interests. If it is only for multiplayer online, those who cannot get internet will not be buying this game. And they can’t blame lost profit on used games with the restrictions already present. This is just a means of justifying Microshit’s double speak on “Always Online”.

Anyone excited for Titanfarce is undeserving of any respect. This could’ve been regular DLC for a Modern Warfare installment for all we care. It is that boring and lifeless. And what’s with this “Parkour” fad all of a sudden? Holding a button and running into shit just do fancy flips is cool now?

*Plays Last Story*

Nope! Just there to be flashy.

Anyone else feel Vanquish deserves this kind of hype and attention? It basically does the same stuff but better and more stimulating than Titanfarce.